Sunday, 26 May 2013

Mummy Friends

I have just got back from dropping the girls off to spend the half term holiday with their Dad. The great thing about doing that is I am able to combine this with seeing my mummy friends.

The arrival of IK into our lives also bought an influx of new friends. I actually made my first mummy friend whilst I was in hospital having IK. We were in opposite beds whilst being induced and then sat together, waiting for labour to start, in the middle of the night after our husbands had been sent home. Hers did and she had her baby in the early hours but I had to wait another 24 hours for IK to make her grand entrance into the world. On the post natal ward we were in opposite beds again and I took it as a sign and gave her my number. And so began our friendship. Through local baby groups I went on to meet lots of other mummies, some of whom I am now lucky enough to call friends.

Having mummy friends is great. Being a new mum can be a very lonely and there are times when you think you might just go crazy. So having people around you with children of the same age is a complete lifesaver. We have shared the tears, fears and general confusion that comes with early motherhood, the anxiety of going back to work and then the arrival of babies number two and in some cases three! We shared milestones big and small from first steps to the first poo on the potty. They have always been a great source of advice, ready to listen and happy to meet in the park to tire the children out!

After I’d had CJ the ex’s job meant he wasn’t really home for 2 months. I was left alone looking after a toddler and a 6 week old baby with reflux who screamed day and night! Exhausted just didn’t go far enough to explain how I felt. I was two hours away from my family and felt very low. But one lovely friend helped me out with IK so I could get a little bit of rest. I later found out she was in the early stage of pregnancy herself and suffering with dreadful morning sickness. It was such a lovely gesture that meant so much to me, and I will always be grateful for her support during that difficult time.

When I was packing to leave Essex I knew there would be a big hole in my life without my mummy friends, but I also knew that we needed to closer to family. So it was with a heavy heart that I said goodbye to the lovely ladies who had become so important to me. We have however been very lucky since we moved that we have started to make some new friends.

So my trip to Essex was great, after a rather wet day at the zoo with the kids me and a friend went for a very rare night out. What started off as a quiet dinner ended with us stumbling into a taxi at 2 am having been chatted up, had drinks bough for us and danced till our feet hurt. Slightly worse for wear, I then met three other lovely friends for a child free lunch. Three and a half hours later we were still sat in the restaurant all making the most of being able to have a conversation that wasn’t punctuated with ‘No don’t do that’ ‘play nicely’ ‘yes I’ll take you for a wee’ and ‘No you can’t have another snack’

I read a quote recently that said ‘Friends are like stars, you don’t have to see them to know they are there’ and I’m very lucky, my mummy friends are, without doubt, stars x 

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